Sunday, July 06, 2008
I'm Confused...
by Ikinz
I'm seriously confused
Confused by the things happening
Around me and inside me
Wherever I go
I let go of my friends one by one
I distant myself from everyone
I find reasons to avoid them
I'm hiding in my shelter
What's wrong with me Allah?
Are you going to take away my life?
Or is this the stage where I've to realise
That I've been ignoring you?
I didn't start well this year
First it's him... then it's her
After that it's them
Soon after it's me
Now, I don't have anyone except you, Allah
I left my friends for no reason
I followed my heart like nobody's business
I don't feel the 'miss' on them at all
Am I that bad, Allah?
To ignore them totally?
To lead my own path
Just with yours and only your guidance?
I don't have friends right now
All because I shunned all of them
I don't have a supportive family
They have their own family
Look at me Allah
I'm alone
Terribly alone
I ran away from problems
At home, in school, out there
I didn't solve them
I don't know how to
I feel unwanted
Is it because I need someone
As a companion?
Or for my desires?
Am I wrong to move away from Ja
Who has bad habits which I don't wanna follow
Am I bad to distant myself from Nor too
Who needs everyone to be sensitive to her
Am I atrocious to forget about Sha's friendship
Not telling her EXACTLY why I left
Am I really inhuman to leave my married friends
Just because I wanna give them their space
And why am I thinking about Hani?
Didn't he make my life miserable
Getting his girl to bombard me with all sorts of judgement
Making me look like a total FOOL
Do I deserve the family I'm having now?
The falling apart family ever since
Things happen with your willings
Will I ever have a complete family again?
My mom was a real pain
I love her more than I love my life
But she doesn't seem to treasure any of us
She loves her brother more than she does to us
Till today... I feel lost
Lost... and not sure why
Was it because I need attention
Or do I need to knock my head?
When I think again, problems may be small
But as such, I couldn't handle them myself
I drag... and wain... and I look
As though I'm asking for sympathy
I cry... and I cry... and I cry...
That's what I do
Till today... I still don't know my real problem
Will you show me, Allah?
Tanpa Mu... Aku hilang selalu...
Give me my strength, Allah
Give me the light, Allah
Show me the right way, Allah
I'm seriously confused
Confused by the things happening
Around me and inside me
Wherever I go
I let go of my friends one by one
I distant myself from everyone
I find reasons to avoid them
I'm hiding in my shelter
What's wrong with me Allah?
Are you going to take away my life?
Or is this the stage where I've to realise
That I've been ignoring you?
I didn't start well this year
First it's him... then it's her
After that it's them
Soon after it's me
Now, I don't have anyone except you, Allah
I left my friends for no reason
I followed my heart like nobody's business
I don't feel the 'miss' on them at all
Am I that bad, Allah?
To ignore them totally?
To lead my own path
Just with yours and only your guidance?
I don't have friends right now
All because I shunned all of them
I don't have a supportive family
They have their own family
Look at me Allah
I'm alone
Terribly alone
I ran away from problems
At home, in school, out there
I didn't solve them
I don't know how to
I feel unwanted
Is it because I need someone
As a companion?
Or for my desires?
Am I wrong to move away from Ja
Who has bad habits which I don't wanna follow
Am I bad to distant myself from Nor too
Who needs everyone to be sensitive to her
Am I atrocious to forget about Sha's friendship
Not telling her EXACTLY why I left
Am I really inhuman to leave my married friends
Just because I wanna give them their space
And why am I thinking about Hani?
Didn't he make my life miserable
Getting his girl to bombard me with all sorts of judgement
Making me look like a total FOOL
Do I deserve the family I'm having now?
The falling apart family ever since
Things happen with your willings
Will I ever have a complete family again?
My mom was a real pain
I love her more than I love my life
But she doesn't seem to treasure any of us
She loves her brother more than she does to us
Till today... I feel lost
Lost... and not sure why
Was it because I need attention
Or do I need to knock my head?
When I think again, problems may be small
But as such, I couldn't handle them myself
I drag... and wain... and I look
As though I'm asking for sympathy
I cry... and I cry... and I cry...
That's what I do
Till today... I still don't know my real problem
Will you show me, Allah?
Tanpa Mu... Aku hilang selalu...
Give me my strength, Allah
Give me the light, Allah
Show me the right way, Allah
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